Am I doing this well or even thoughtfully?

I really really like this thought:

I don't get to decide what happens to me in life; often the only decision I get to be a part of is what I do with it after the happening.

So often, life just happens. No matter how intentional we may plan to be or how unintentional our personalities may be (this is where I find myself most often).

Stuff happens.

Good stuff. Bad stuff. Ugly stuff. Sad stuff. Wonderous and Awesome stuff.

How we process this stuff is where I am right now. I am reflective about it. I am living in it. I am wondering about how well I do this.

It's kind of like follow up to an event. The whole "how'd it go, what could we do better, what would we never do again and how can we change this".

Life often doesn't give us do overs. Words can not be gathered back up, rewind and say the better, less abrasive thing. Actions are the same. One chance is what we get. Live and learn many would say.

I am thinking it is more then that. Perhaps it is learn and then live well.

I am being convicted all over again about where my focus, my heart, my attention need to be. Not just some of the time, but all of the time. Each moment in time. When I continually work on those things, the reactions to life? They are much more tempered and better played out. Better thought out.

Basic stuff I know. Just something I need to come back to again and again and remind myself of. Guess the beginning of a new year is a good time to think on these things.

Scriptures are flooding through my mind right now, to many to list but that's the point isn't it? Scripture saturating our minds, overflowing into our lives. Not knowing and parsing the words adn meanings but rather, living them out.

And guess what? I stink at this on my own. Oh I know lots of scripture, a heritage and blessing of my youth for sure, and what I can't quite remember? I am a mean and quick concordance user. But that is just it. I know it, but am I living it?

I know the power of prayer but am I praying? I know the power of scripture but am I letting it guide my every action and more importantly, my reactions? I know the peace offered to me in the security of my Faith, let alone the incredible Power offered there but am I living daily there?

And that about sums it up. I AM sure of what I hope for and certain of what I can not see. And because of that Faith? I need to keep myself infused with that Power, the Power through my Faith in Him who lives within me to react according to His Word and His Will, not my own.

Oh Sweet Jesus, make my ponderings more then words, make them my hearts desire for you in all. Help my wondering heart to come home to you that I may live my life according to your good purpose. Less of me, more of you.

Sooo hard to do some days. You know God, you know.